OF COURSE that's the label they'd slap on you. You are shockingly talented, being able to consistently show up for multiple amounts of people in various and unrelated situations and produce quality regardless of the effort involved.
It makes sense to not have time and space for yourself when you are occupied with exercising your gift of making a way out of what many would see as a "dead-end". Your own survival had been laden in making a way out of dead ends, so even when the air got choked out of you you still found a way to slip through the cracks and breathe. They have no idea what a dead end is. That is the problem.
They have never truly choked.
Many people have what they have today because you were a "people pleaser".
Many people have elevated situations and comfortable lives thanks to your ability to design structure for those who clearly had none.
You could say you had pity for them.
Of course you want people who aren't taking care of themselves to do better. Left alone, these people become the savages of humanity, clamoring for every penny, scrap of food, and every bit of emotional refuge that they can get even though with love in themselves they would find so much abundance they wouldn't know what to do with themselves... and that should be the point.
But they don't know that.
When you met them you entertained their frivolous attempts at making themselves happy. You observed their every move, astounded at the petty ways they made themselves laugh while you knew that inside they were dying.
Of course they'd call you a "people pleaser".
You stayed by the side of someone who if left alone would not have had a single clue how to live their lives outside of a social system that told them what to do, how to sleep, what to think, how to breathe, what to pay attention to... They needed help, even if they never asked for it.
Why do we think that people need to discover things for themselves in order to truly become what they are capable of? Why do people dismiss the effect one human can have on the other? Why do we believe that without a system in place there is only chaos?
These are not the thoughts of people who have faith in human beings... through which systems are designed.
They tried to claim that YOU were the "people pleaser" as they huddled in their muddied system of society (where there was barely any space to fit already) while they pleased the system, which (not ironically) is comprised of and set up by older people they need to please in order to fit in.
Exactly who is the "people pleaser" here?
Sure, their reasoning is that they see the success of those who followed the system, but they don't tell you that those people are not their role models in life. They don't tell you that they don't want to live like the people that tell them when to clock in and out. They don't share with you that they don't want to live out their lives in degrees they had to mortgage for a paycheck. They don't say that they don't want to live like the people that control them.
They don't tell you that their soul wrings itself out in anguish because they have to say things they don't want to say, do things they don't want to do just to be recognized by a title, not even by their name. And that is the problem. They are chasing a title, not a person, a face, or even themselves. So of course you can't get through to them. They are reading words on a screen, and if you're not reading the words from the same screen then you're the one who isn't making sense.
But you are the "people pleaser".
They claim you're the "people pleaser" even though if you stopped "pleasing" tomorrow they would be clawing at the fading vestige of your existence, wondering how to even breathe the air in their very own lungs.
But you should let them suffocate. They have never choked before. They have taken air from other people when they comfortably had their own supply to work with. They would say they were choking but they wouldn't tell you that they were choking because they didn't know how to breathe in their own air.
They were only good at doing one thing at a time, and having to breathe while following instructions would have been too much for them... but they wouldn't tell you that. They aren't as talented as you were after all. They were too busy being a "people pleaser" to those they were sure would give them air to breathe because they were too afraid to inhale on their own. It is no coincidence that in the end they are the ones who are incompetent and incapable, while you thrive, uninhibited.
Let the real "people pleasers" find their own crack to breathe through for air.
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